Whose timeline are you actually on?

I woke up on Sunday morning, my inner voice in full on negative mode. I was discouraged and tried to break out of it. Even if you aren't that into astrology, you've probably heard people talking about the new moon in Aries, the intensity of it joining so many other planets in the same sign, literally a once-in-a-millennium experience. Basically, it's an intense focus on self, fully stepping into who we are as individuals in our identity and how we will choose to move forward. So why did I wake up feeling it more as an added weight than excited for the possibility? I thought back on the wonderful weekend I had just spent with a bunch of different friends having great experiences. One friend I saw at a party, I hadn't connected with in almost a year. He asked what I had been up to. When I caught him up on my Managing Broker role at Nest Realty in Richmond and the growth in my private coaching practice, he lit up. "That makes complete sense, this is so who you are! It has all of the things that you are an expert in, it makes obvious sense that you would thrive in these positions. That's great Annie." His words felt so great to hear, validation for all my hard work. I stood a little taller, smiled a bit bigger. Less than 24 hours later, discouragement and irritability crept into my thoughts. Without hesitation, he had seen me clearly. No question of my authenticity whatsoever. Yet me standing in that same power first thing yesterday morning felt uncomfortable and false. During coach training we were asked to interview three close friends and ask them how they would describe us. The results I received back then align almost exactly with my friend's perspective from the weekend. When we take a look at what others see in us, how they describe us, how they see our strengths, it can be startling how clearly they see the things we sometimes struggle to own within ourselves. My work this week is not allowing the doubt to settle in as truth. Don't believe everything you tell yourself. I see myself as the dahlia I described last week, in a stage of retracting. It is okay for my growth to be in a place where opening more feels like too much, no matter what the astrology says. This is where my work is. In my own time. At my own pace. Slow does not mean stuck, it does require patience with yourself. I find change that which happens slowly tends to be longer lasting. I am moving with intention. Letting my internal beliefs shift to the truth of how I I already show up in the world. Not becoming anything new. Just settling into what is already true and finding joy in that, rather than frustration from the untruths that pass through my thoughts sometimes. There is a song I have been thinking about this week that ties into exactly how I am feeling… …In order to honor my words above, I am going to sit with it a little longer before I share it. Until next week, be kind to yourself.